The Littlest Psychic
by SuperSpeedy
Summary: My First baby Ness fic! Not to mention my first fic for the best RPG in the world! Read & Review, please! Rated PG for violence, suggestive themes, and referances to Satan! Chapter 3 is up! (FROZEN UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.)
1. Intro: PSI Visions of the Past

(Author's Note: I do not own EarthBound or any related characters. A mister Itoi is the mastermind behind EarthBound. I also make references to INVADER ZIM, a cartoon created by cartoon genius Jhohen Vasquez and not owned by me. It's unlikely you'll meet Itoi around here. But if you meet Vasquez, say hi to him and praise him on a great cartoon!)  
  
The Littlest Psychic  
  
Introduction  
  
It was an average day. Ness was just watching his favorite cartoon. Nothing much was happening. And it wasn't long ago that he beat Giygas and became a hero!  
  
"Something is broken, and it's not your fault?" said the alien on the TV.  
  
"I know," said the robot on the TV. "I'm scared too!"  
  
The robot slid down the walls and landed next to the alien.  
  
(For some reason,) thought Ness, (I've always seemed to like this show. I don't know how it appeals to me, but it just does. Maybe Mom will know.)  
  
"MOM!" shouted Ness. Ness's mom came downstairs.  
  
"What is it, honey?" said Mrs. Franklin.  
  
(Super-speedy author's note: I used to go to a site where many people accepted that Ness's last name was "Franklin". Thus, I'll be using that as his last name!)  
  
"Why do I like this show?" asked Ness.  
  
"'INVADER ZIM'? I'm not sure. It could have to do with you and the adventure you had some time ago."  
  
"Mom, I liked that show before then."  
  
"Then it could have to do with when you were only a few months old. Your dad and I were carrying you up to your room, and suddenly, somehow, the TV turned on and turned to 'INVADER ZIM'. I'm drawing a blank after that."  
  
"Thanks, anyway."  
  
Ness decided to pick up the phone and call and old friend.  
  
[Dalaam]  
  
"Prince Poo! Prince Poo!" said a strange looking man. He appeared to have a phone on his head.  
  
"What is it, my phone-man?" said Poo, who was sitting on his throne.  
  
"Telephone," said the man.  
  
Poo carefully removed the phone headpiece, trying not to decapitate the phone-man as Ness almost did once. He spoke into the receiver. "Hello?"  
  
"Hey, Poo. It's me! Ness."  
  
"Nice to hear from you again, Ness!"  
  
"Listen. I have some questions about my past that trouble me. Now I know you don't know much about my past, but I'm sure you could probably do something that'll help me remember my past."  
  
"Well, there is a skill I learn during Mu training. I could help you recover suppressed memories. However, I would be able to see them, too. As would anyone in a very close vicinity. Are you willing to take that risk?"  
  
"Sure! I know a very secluded area where no one will find us! I'll see you at my house tomorrow. I'll lead you to my spot from there! Bye!"  
  
"Bye!"  
  
Poo hung up the phone.  
  
[Onett, Eagleland]  
  
Ness hangs up the phone.  
  
"Hi, Ness!" said a voice. It was Paula! "I heard the whole thing."  
  
"Paula!" shouted Ness. "What gives you the right to eavesdrop on my conversations?"  
  
Paula kept quiet. She loved Ness, but didn't know how to express it. And every time she tried, she choked!  
  
"Anyway," said Ness, "if you want to come along, meet me in my club house in the woods near the library."  
  
"OK! And Ness, Jeff bugged your phone line."  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
Ness frantically searched for anything suspicious. He found it in the form of a metal fly with a phone jack in its butt and a phone connector for a head. Ness went around back of his house, and found Jeff sleeping in the bushes behind his house.  
  
(The next day)  
  
[Ness's secret shack]  
  
"Okay, Ness," instructed Poo, "lay down on that table."  
  
Ness did as instructed. Poo placed his hands on Ness's head.  
  
They both went into a trance. 


	2. The Boy with the Gifted Mind

(Author's Note: I do not own EarthBound or any related characters. A mister Itoi is the mastermind behind EarthBound. I also make references to INVADER ZIM, a cartoon created by cartoon genius Jhohen Vasquez and not owned by me. It's unlikely you'll meet Itoi around here. But if you meet Vasquez, say hi to him and praise him on a great cartoon!)  
  
The Littlest Psychic  
  
The Baby With The Gifted Brain  
  
Ness and Poo could see baby Ness. It wasn't from a first person view for Ness and Poo, but rather third. They were just standing next to Ness's crib.  
  
"Go ahead," said Mrs. Franklin. "Put the hat on his head."  
  
Mr. Franklin did so. "Oh, doesn't he look cute? Now, what shall we name him?"  
  
Mrs. Franklin suggested, "Ness."  
  
"Ness," repeated Mr. Franklin. "Hmm… I think Ness is the right name for him. Look! He smiled at his name! He likes it."  
  
"I'm sure he'll be a thoughtful, strong boy. Now, let's go to the kitchen. I got steak on the stove."  
  
Just then, baby Ness pointed at a bottle, and it shifted an inch to the right.  
  
"Um, honey?" said Mr. Franklin. "Did that bottle just move a little?"  
  
"Oh, Fred!" replied Mrs. Franklin.  
  
(another Super-speedy author's note: Frank is a name I made up to use as Mr. Franklin's first name. For all I know, his first name could be Tomato! Sorry, that was a shameless plug for the site I used to go to!)  
  
Mr. and Mrs. Franklin then left the room. Baby Ness pointed at the bottle again, and it moved an inch to the left. Ness did this a few more times until he outstretched his arms and the bottle slowly floated towards him. Little Ness then rubbed his forehead and proceeded to drink from his bottle.  
  
(My head hurts,) thought baby Ness.  
  
This creeped Ness out. The fact he could hear his younger self think just creeped Ness out. However, Poo was cool and calm throughout the whole thing.  
  
After baby Ness finished drinking, he climbed to the top of the crib, and jumped to the window. Somehow, he used PSI to make a second jump.  
  
Whenever baby Ness moved, Poo and Ness moved in sync with him.  
  
(SSAN: Oh, no! I made a reference to a music group made of pure evil!)  
  
Ness and Poo watched as walked along a dirt road, and up towards the house of treasure hunter/sign-maker: Liar X. Agerate.  
  
Upon reaching Liar's house, baby Ness knocked on the door. The door opened.  
  
"Red hat?" said the man, who was obviously Liar. "You must be the Franklins' new boy!"  
  
Daddy! said baby Ness.  
  
(SSAN: I use arrow brackets to indicate telepathy!)  
  
"AHH!" Liar shouted as he tossed the child into the air. "Demon baby! Demon baby!!"  
  
When little Ness landed, he let out a scream that could wake the dead! Not to mention a PSI attack that'd kill most any small animals that got in the way!  
  
"Maybe this isn't the spawn of Satan…" said Liar. "Maybe, he's just gifted! Yeah! He's mentally gifted like I'm psychically gifted!"  
  
Liar took little Ness into his humble abode. Once inside, Liar checked his clock.  
  
"Oh, my!" he said. "It's 9:00! 'INVADER ZIM' is on! That was so nice that Mr. Vasquez put his new cartoon on here in Eagleland before he decided to bring it to the USA."  
  
There it was, the answer to Ness's question. Mr. Agerate introduced him to "ZIM"! Yet, he didn't want to stop there. He wanted to learn more about his past.  
  
"Pitiful Earth propaganda!" said ZIM, on the TV. "To think a mighty alien species could be felled by something as pitiful as 'germs'!"  
  
Just then, Ness was back in his shack. He looked at Poo. Poo was exhausted.  
  
"I'm going to the Deep Darkness," said Ness. "I'll be back with some Magic truffles for you, Poo." 


	3. Ketchup, Truffles, and Paula Polestar

The Littlest Psychic  
  
Chapter 2: Truffles, Ketchup, and Paula Polestar  
  
"I'm back, Poo!" Ness said as he walked through the door.  
  
"Have you got the truffles?" Poo asked.  
  
"Sure did!" Ness said, as he squirted ketchup on the mushrooms.  
  
"Eww!" said Poo. "Why couldn't you buy Delisauce instead?"  
  
"Too expensive!" replied Ness. "Besides, 'ketchup compliments most any food you can find nowadays. Tomato Kraken Soup is often considered a delicacy! Mushrooms compliment the sweet, tomato-y taste found in these packets of…'"  
  
"You're reading that off of the ketchup packet, aren't you?"  
  
"I… well, yes. But trust me! I've tried mushrooms on my pizza, and it's very tasty!"  
  
"What does pizza have to do with ketchup?"  
  
"Tomatoes."  
  
"Fine. But I can't guarantee that I'll like it."  
  
Poo took a bite of the ketchup-coated mushrooms. Then he took another. And another. Pretty soon, the truffle's cap was gone.  
  
"I don't eat the stem of mushrooms," Poo said. "I was taught they were poisonous. Can I have another truffle?"  
  
"I knew you'd like it!" said Ness, as he handed Poo another ketchup- smothered Magic truffle.  
  
Once again, Poo ate the whole cap, throwing the ketchup-dabbed stem to the side.  
  
"OK, I'm ready," said Poo.  
  
Ness lied on the table again, but was soon interrupted by a voice.  
  
"Is this a private party, or can anyone join?" said the voice. It was Jeff. Ness took out his bat, and hit Jeff with it repeatedly!  
  
"HOW DARE YOU TAP INTO MY PHONE LINE?! YOU CAN'T JUST DO THAT! WHAT ABOUT MY PRIVACY?!" Ness screamed at the top of his lungs, as he beat Jeff senseless. He then went back to lie down on the table.  
  
Once again, Poo placed his hands on Ness's back. And once again, Ness and Poo went into a trance.  
  
This time, Ness saw himself at the age of three. Little Ness was asleep, with his mother struggling to get him out of bed.  
  
"Wake up, honey!" said Mrs. Franklin. "Today's your first day of preschool, and you don't want to be late!"  
  
"Five more minutes!" said little Ness.  
  
Mrs. Franklin sighed. "We should've never let you watch that meteor shower."  
  
Ness woke up. "Meteor shower?" said the little tyke, finally waking up. "Where?"  
  
"Good!" said Mrs. Franklin "You're up! Come on and get dressed. You don't want to be late for your first day of preschool!"  
  
"Why should I get up?" said Ness. "It's going to be boring!"  
  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah! You're a real psychic."  
  
There was doubt in her voice.  
  
"I want dad to see me off," said Ness.  
  
"He can't!" said Mrs. Franklin. "You know he's on a business trip!"  
  
Just then, the phone rang. Ness ran and picked it up.  
  
"Franklin home!" said Ness. "Who's speaking?"  
  
"Hey, Ness!" said the voice. "How's my little boy?"  
  
"Good, dad!" replied Ness. "I miss you!  
  
"I miss you, too! I promise I'll be home by your birthday. Anyway, I talked to the people at the local karate dojo, and I managed to sign you up!"  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah! It'll be a nice way for you to learn to focus! And focus is something you'll need to do!"  
  
"Oh. Well, I'll talk to you later! You seem to be breaking up!"  
  
"It's this dang portable phone Dr. Andonuts made for…"  
  
Ness hung up. He felt so happy. Yet something was missing from his agenda.  
  
"Mr. X!" shouted Ness.  
  
Ness ran up the mountain to the house of Liar X. Agerate.  
  
"Hello there, Nessy!" said Liar.  
  
"Hello, Mr. X!" said young Ness. "Guess what?"  
  
"What?" said Liar.  
  
"I'm going to preschool!"  
  
"Wow! The only preschool I know in this country is Polestar Preschool. Who's going to take you?"  
  
Ness thought hard. "A blue van. There will be other kids from Onett on board. Pokey and Picky will be there, too! I like them! They're nice!"  
  
"Wow!" said Liar. "Well, you better go, now! You don't want to be late for the van!"  
  
"Bye, Mr. X!" said Ness.  
  
"Bye, little Ness!" responded Liar.  
  
Ness ran down the mountain, only to be stopped by Pokey.  
  
"Ness! Come on!" said Pokey. "You're going to make us late! I'm not taking any guff for you wanting to talk with your weirdo friend."  
  
"Mr. X. is not weird!" replied Ness.  
  
"Pokey!" shouted Picky. "Must you bother Ness? Just because he happens to know Mr. Exaggerate, it doesn't mean you should call him a weirdo."  
  
"The only thing he eats is garlic!" responded Pokey.  
  
"I remember you eating a lot a garlic at one time!"  
  
"Why'd you call him 'Mr. Exaggerate'?" said Ness. "His name is Liar X. Agerate! Come on, the van is coming!"  
  
The trio walked down the mountain to the urban part of Onett. Sure enough, the bus/van was waiting right there. While Pokey stood in the doorway, scratching his head, Ness and Picky had already gotten in!  
  
"Get in and close the door, already!" shouted one kid.  
  
"What's the matter, fatso?" cried another. "Mommy forgot to pack your walker?"  
  
"I'll give you an ice cream if you get in!" jeered another. "Better hurry before it melts!"  
  
"Still need your milky bottle, baby?" Ness joined in. He didn't know what he got himself into, because right there, Pokey lunged at him and smothered Ness with his 35 pounds of muscle and flab!  
  
(Author's note: For a three-year old, that's a lot!)  
  
"HEY!" shouted the bus driver. "Sit down! NO FIGHTING!"  
  
The two then sat down. Pokey was in the back, while Ness was in the front.  
  
Shortly, they had stopped in front of Polestar Preschool! From the fresh air to the cat on the roof, Ness felt that a good day was coming.  
  
He just didn't know *how* good!  
  
"Hello, class!" said the teacher. "I'm Mrs. Polestar!"  
  
"Hello, Mrs. Polestar!" responded the class.  
  
"I would like to spend the first few days getting to know the class," said Mrs. Polestar. "Before I begin, I'd like to introduce to you my daughter, Paula! Come on out, Paula!"  
  
Just then, a little girl in a pink dress with a little pink bow came out, crutching her teddy bear.  
  
"Paula will be learning along side you," said Mrs. Polestar. "And just to note…"  
  
Ness didn't hear the rest of the sentence. He could tell that there was something special about Paula. He couldn't put his fingers on it until… he remembered when he met Mr. X. He remembered some kind of force. He could sense that same force coming from Paula.  
  
Whatever it was, Ness liked Paula for some reason other than… that force.  
  
"Now, I want to know about you," said Mrs. Polestar. "Starting with the boy in the red cap. Who are you?"  
  
Ness looked up. "What did you say again?"  
  
Laughter. That's all Ness heard after his question. Laughter. He felt so humiliated.  
  
Out of nowhere, Pokey jumped on top of Ness!  
  
Ness tried to focus on the force that he remembered from his meeting with Liar. He tried to reenact the scene. But the weight was too much. He couldn't focus!  
  
Ness blacked out.  
  
When Ness came to, he was hurting all over.  
  
"Where… am… I?" he said.  
  
"You're in Twoson hospital," said the doctor. "And it's a good thing you came to! You should thank this young lady! She dragged you all the way here!"  
  
The "young lady" crawled up to the foot of the bed.  
  
"Paula?" shouted Ness in disbelief.  
  
Paula jumped down and ran home. Just then, a mob of news reporters came rushing into Ness's room.  
  
"I'm sorry! Miss Polestar is not here!" said the Doctor. "All we have here is an injured boy!"  
  
Mrs. Franklin pushed through the mob. "I came here as soon as I could, honey!" she said. "What happened?"  
  
"Pokey… crushed… me!" said Ness.  
  
Just then, the hospital room, doctor, and the news crews vanished, and Ness, 13, was back in his hut. Poo was once again exhausted.  
  
(Back to the Deep Darkness!) thought Ness. 


End file.
